Since it's practically that time of year, (It's like it comes every year or something), I figured I would talk a bit about Christmas before I told more stories about my traumatizing childhood experiences. As an only child growing, Christmas was probably the single greatest day of my entire life. I spent the entire month of November preparing myself. I would get all the catalogs as they arrived, and go through and cut out the toys and things that I wanted and glue them to a few pieces of construction paper. Placing them in order of 'Things I REALLY want' down to, "If I got this I would not be upset". And I would happily hand it over to my parents. This was so there was no confusion when they went to the store. They could easily find my presents or walk to an employee and point to it and say, "WHERE ARE ALL THESE THINGS?"
I made things simple for them.
As for Santa, I don't remember sending Santa a list of things I wanted, I always just assumed that my Parents would buy me things that they wanted to take credit for and then for those really big gifts they would just Fax Santa the list I gave them showing him what I wanted. Maybe I wrote him a few times. But I always just assumed it was the parents job to let Santa know what to get me.
I could never sleep on Christmas Eve, ever. We spent Christmas Eve with my Dad's family. So I usually had a few presents from that side of the family to keep my company. One year I even got one of those rainbow ribbon twirly thingies, because my cousin had one....and I thought it was really cool, so my Aunt got me one. OMGIWASSOGAY
But most of the time I got CD's or gift cards and the ever so popular 'Crazy Christmas Ornament' from my Aunt and Uncle, the same ones that gave me the rainbow twirly thing. I freaking love those Ornaments, they were always so odd and my parents would just shake there head, realizing slowly that I was an 'artistic' soul. How dare I.
Most years we would go out 'Christmas Caroling' which consisted of my Cousins and I running through our Grandparent's neighborhood, screaming Christmas songs at the top of our lungs. Not even knocking on peoples doors just, yelling Rudolph in the streets. And they would always point up in the sky at planes that had red lights on them, saying it was Santa, but I always think in my head, "Why is he flying so high when he has ALL THESE HOUSES to go to...and it's only like 8 o'clock...shouldn't he be finishing up England?" but I kept these ideas to myself because I feared that my cousins would SHUN THE NON-BELIEVERRRR! But I totally believed in Santa. Why would I not believe in someone so awesome that brings me the best presents every year? Who cares if they are made by slave labor! I wanted a Super Nintendo DANG IT!
So I would always rush my Parents home, along with my other Cousins who were like OMG. STOP TALKING. WHAT ARE YOU DOING. CHRISTMAS. SANTA. WE GOTTA GO. And they would turn on the radio in the car talking about how SANTA HAS BEEN SPOTTED and I would be in the back seat, vibrating like a hummingbird on crack. Wishing that we could be home NOW. My parents always tried to make the trip easier, "So did you like what you got from *insert family member here*"
"YES."
"Do you really or do you just want to be home?"
"HOW FAR AWAY ARE WE." *twitch twitch*"
So we would get home, I would rush inside and change into my Pajamas and would get out the CEREMONIAL Santa plate, which was made for me by a friend of my Mom's. I would put out the cookies and the carrots for Santa. And every year I would reach for the milk and my parents would say, "Oh Santa doesn't drink Milk, he drinks diet coke." I would think back to the TV commercials for coke with Santa and realize, oh yeah, he totally does doesn't he?
I would, once again, attempted to convince my parents that we should start a tradition of opening ONE present on Christmas Eve. I attempted this every single year and every year I was shot down. So lame. I would scurry upstairs in a hurry and crawl into my race car water bed (Jealous?) and wait.
(See? Totally drinks Coke)
I would, once again, attempted to convince my parents that we should start a tradition of opening ONE present on Christmas Eve. I attempted this every single year and every year I was shot down. So lame. I would scurry upstairs in a hurry and crawl into my race car water bed (Jealous?) and wait.
...
Oh god the waiting.
Oh god WHY can't Christmas start at Midnight on Christmas Eve?! WHY DOES SANTA TAKE SO LONG. OH GOD WHY. I JUST WANT TO RIP APART EVERYTHING EVER UNDER THE TREE.
My parents had a rule about Christmas. I was not allowed to wake them up before the sun came up. So I would lay in bed and try my hardest to sleep. I would toss and turn, butterfly swarming in my stomach from all the excitement. A few times I would think I would hear Santa but I was always too scared to go down stairs. I know that if I did he wouldn't leave me any presents...right? Isn't that how it works? So I tried to sleep. Waking up in excitement and checking the clock.
2:13 am. Damn
4:29 am. Dammit!
5:06 am DAMMIT!!!
5:16 am WHYYYY
But you bet your ass AS SOON as the Sun peeked over the horizon, I was OUT OF THAT BED and THUMPING down the stairs and running into my parents room and shaking them senseless, "IT'S CHRISTMAAAAAAAAAS!!!!"
And they would always tell me to wait before I started to open the presents so they could get the camera. I would have already organized all the presents by who they were for, who they were from, their wrapping paper and size before they even sat down. They would slowly lug into the living room and I would already be tearing into my stocking. My Dad kept telling me to wait for him to make some coffee. BUT THERE IS NO TIME FOR COFFEE. THIS IS CHRISTMAS. I CANNOT WAIT ONE SECOND LONGER.
And so my Mom would give the, "Oh just let him go at it." and he would huff about it and come sit down because he wanted to watch me open presents but also wanted delicious coffee.
Christmas time for me was usually video game season. I don't know about you guys but this was the time when I got video games, I was rarely the kind of kid that got games during the rest of the year. Maybe a few here and there when my parents found some they didnt want to sell for work, but this was the big games. All three of my most favorite consoles (four if you count the giftcard to buy a Wii because my Mom was not going to waste time looking around for one), Super Nintendo, Nintendo 64 and Playstation 2 were all christmas gifts. I also received many a classics this time of year. Majora's Mask being one of my most favorite games ever was a Christmas gift that sent me into a thirteen year old panic attack.
Though, when I played it for the first time, I realized THE RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF NIGHTMARE FUEL THE GAME INDUCED, it stayed in timeout for about 6 months until I picked up the courage to try it again.
(See that Moon? You have three days to stop it from destroying the world. Oh god why D8)
But Christmas was a good time. After my presents were ripped to shreds, I was given about an hour and a half to play or fiddle with whatever new toys I had received. Usually I took this time to play video games or introduce my newest toys to the rest in my closet, then we lugged over to Grandma's House and had glorious Christmas lunch/dinner with them and MOAR PRESENTS! Magical I say, just magical.
The day after Christmas was probably one of my favorites, to be honest. This was what I liked to call Bragging Day. In which friends would visit or vice versa and we would show off our newest swag. I think I always won, only because out of all my friends, I was the only only child. I usually had double the amount of presents, though a good majority of them were cloths and the like, I still got the good presents. Whenever I got a new gaming system, my friends usually found their way into my house with a controller in their hand.
Now that I'm older and no longer ten, I try to think back to those days of yesteryear. They are just those faded memories of childhood greed. I knew that Christmas meant family and togetherness, and for those that were religious, that whole baby Jesus thing. But can you blame me for being a selfish little dork? Christmas was the one time of year when it was almost guaranteed you would be getting some sort of present. Not to mention when your parents OUT RIGHT ASK YOU, "What do you want?" besides your Birthday, and maybe a few other holidays, depending on how your family is (I always got a few things on Easter), this is the only time they will actually GET YOU WHAT YOU WANT. Those many days of staring longingly into the clear glass walls of the Video Game case at Wal-Mart and saying I WANT THAT ONE finally was going to happen. I mean unless you asked for a Pony, which I don't know too many people that actually got Ponies, but dang it, you can dream.
Now Christmas means planning to go out of town, and for me, a track through the heart of Texas and back in only a two days time. It means, "Oh god, we still have to get a present for so-and-so" and hearing a knock at the door when a new gift arrives from someone you weren't planning on getting a gift for. Your wallet shrinking back in despair.
It means Christmas Bonuses from work, of Gift Cards for Grocery stores that do not exist within a 2 hour drive (true story :|). It's realizing how fat you are after thanksgiving and that going on a diet would be pathetic when Christmas dinner is only a few days away. It's getting gifts from distant family members that you only talk to during the holidays and having to pretend that you really like them. Christmas is a fairly difficult holiday when you grow up. Sure your parents might get you something you'd like or a boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/lover/wife/husband/domestic partner/whatever the hell you want to call them, might spoil you with a gift or two. But Christmas is not as exciting as it once was. And that kind of sucks.
I still love the Holidays, don't get me wrong. I still hope that maybe I'll get a few things that I've been longing for. And I do love getting to see my family, even if it is for a much shorter amount of time then I would like it to be, that exciting flailing rabid boy leaves you a long time before you become 'an adult'.
Well....this got awfully depressing. I didn't mean for it to, I just wanted to show the contrast of growing up. All I really want for Christmas is time to relax. I want to be able to see everyone that I haven't seen in so long and just chill. I miss those days of piles of presents all labeled to ME but those days are gone, and that's okay. I'm fine with that. I really have everything I could possibly need. Sure I want plenty of things, but who doesn't? You get something brand new, top of the line, these days it goes out of style in minutes.
Lets end this on a happy note. How about a joke?
Why does Santa like to work in the garden?
Anyone?
Annnnyoooone?
........
................
...................................
BECAUSE HE LIKES TO HOE HOE HOE!
Get it?
Aha
Merry Christmas Everyone and if you don't celebrate Christmas, than Happy Whatever That Is.
And so my Mom would give the, "Oh just let him go at it." and he would huff about it and come sit down because he wanted to watch me open presents but also wanted delicious coffee.
Christmas time for me was usually video game season. I don't know about you guys but this was the time when I got video games, I was rarely the kind of kid that got games during the rest of the year. Maybe a few here and there when my parents found some they didnt want to sell for work, but this was the big games. All three of my most favorite consoles (four if you count the giftcard to buy a Wii because my Mom was not going to waste time looking around for one), Super Nintendo, Nintendo 64 and Playstation 2 were all christmas gifts. I also received many a classics this time of year. Majora's Mask being one of my most favorite games ever was a Christmas gift that sent me into a thirteen year old panic attack.
Though, when I played it for the first time, I realized THE RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF NIGHTMARE FUEL THE GAME INDUCED, it stayed in timeout for about 6 months until I picked up the courage to try it again.
But Christmas was a good time. After my presents were ripped to shreds, I was given about an hour and a half to play or fiddle with whatever new toys I had received. Usually I took this time to play video games or introduce my newest toys to the rest in my closet, then we lugged over to Grandma's House and had glorious Christmas lunch/dinner with them and MOAR PRESENTS! Magical I say, just magical.
The day after Christmas was probably one of my favorites, to be honest. This was what I liked to call Bragging Day. In which friends would visit or vice versa and we would show off our newest swag. I think I always won, only because out of all my friends, I was the only only child. I usually had double the amount of presents, though a good majority of them were cloths and the like, I still got the good presents. Whenever I got a new gaming system, my friends usually found their way into my house with a controller in their hand.
Now that I'm older and no longer ten, I try to think back to those days of yesteryear. They are just those faded memories of childhood greed. I knew that Christmas meant family and togetherness, and for those that were religious, that whole baby Jesus thing. But can you blame me for being a selfish little dork? Christmas was the one time of year when it was almost guaranteed you would be getting some sort of present. Not to mention when your parents OUT RIGHT ASK YOU, "What do you want?" besides your Birthday, and maybe a few other holidays, depending on how your family is (I always got a few things on Easter), this is the only time they will actually GET YOU WHAT YOU WANT. Those many days of staring longingly into the clear glass walls of the Video Game case at Wal-Mart and saying I WANT THAT ONE finally was going to happen. I mean unless you asked for a Pony, which I don't know too many people that actually got Ponies, but dang it, you can dream.
Now Christmas means planning to go out of town, and for me, a track through the heart of Texas and back in only a two days time. It means, "Oh god, we still have to get a present for so-and-so" and hearing a knock at the door when a new gift arrives from someone you weren't planning on getting a gift for. Your wallet shrinking back in despair.
It means Christmas Bonuses from work, of Gift Cards for Grocery stores that do not exist within a 2 hour drive (true story :|). It's realizing how fat you are after thanksgiving and that going on a diet would be pathetic when Christmas dinner is only a few days away. It's getting gifts from distant family members that you only talk to during the holidays and having to pretend that you really like them. Christmas is a fairly difficult holiday when you grow up. Sure your parents might get you something you'd like or a boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/lover/wife/husband/domestic partner/whatever the hell you want to call them, might spoil you with a gift or two. But Christmas is not as exciting as it once was. And that kind of sucks.
I still love the Holidays, don't get me wrong. I still hope that maybe I'll get a few things that I've been longing for. And I do love getting to see my family, even if it is for a much shorter amount of time then I would like it to be, that exciting flailing rabid boy leaves you a long time before you become 'an adult'.
Well....this got awfully depressing. I didn't mean for it to, I just wanted to show the contrast of growing up. All I really want for Christmas is time to relax. I want to be able to see everyone that I haven't seen in so long and just chill. I miss those days of piles of presents all labeled to ME but those days are gone, and that's okay. I'm fine with that. I really have everything I could possibly need. Sure I want plenty of things, but who doesn't? You get something brand new, top of the line, these days it goes out of style in minutes.
Lets end this on a happy note. How about a joke?
Why does Santa like to work in the garden?
Anyone?
Annnnyoooone?
........
................
...................................
BECAUSE HE LIKES TO HOE HOE HOE!
Get it?
Aha
Merry Christmas Everyone and if you don't celebrate Christmas, than Happy Whatever That Is.
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